


Patience

by WritingSiren



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Frian, Giving Birth, Insecurity, M/M, Mpreg, Pregnancy, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, maycury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 13:49:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22942840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingSiren/pseuds/WritingSiren
Summary: Freddie and Brian have been trying for a baby for months now. After many failed tests, Freddie finally gets pregnant, and the two of them are excited to become parents. Together, they go through the ups and downs of future parenthood.
Relationships: Brian May/Freddie Mercury
Comments: 7
Kudos: 19





	Patience

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone!! I'm back with another story~ Now, this one is different, in the sense that I've never written an mpreg story before. I used to read them back in the day (when I was in other fandoms), and I always felt that they were all pretty much the same: Two guys have sex (usually forced upon by one of them), guy gets pregnant, guy doesn't want the baby, but then eventually grows to love the child (and his awful partner), and then... Happily ever after...???? It gets old really fast.
> 
> I've always wondered, "Is there an mpreg story where the guys _actually_ want the baby and plan for one?" So, I decided to just write one myself!
> 
> This story is purely fiction. I am not trying to imply or make any statements about the people involved. Please keep that in mind while reading. I don't usually say that with other fics I write, but I feel that I need to given the subject matter of this one.
> 
> Alright, so I'm gonna stop talking now and let you all read! Hope you like it!!

Freddie anxiously paced around the bathroom as he waited for the test results. _'This time'_, he thought. _'This time will be the one. It has to be.'_

Freddie and Brian tried to plan everything just right to have a successful conception. Freddie had given up drinking and smoking about a couple months prior, and he and Brian had sex during Freddie's ovulation as much as possible. Freddie had even temporarily stopped Testosterone, as their doctor told them it would make it easier to conceive. The thought that maybe one of them was infertile had crossed their minds a few times, which was rather upsetting to think about. And even though they made visits to the doctor regularly (or as often as their schedules would allow), and would be tested for diseases or other complications, they still couldn't help but worry that maybe they weren't the healthiest they could be.

They felt like they had tried everything at this point, but they wouldn't give up.

A couple more agonizing minutes passed, which was enough time for the test to read the urine sample. Freddie closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he picked up the stick...

He counted aloud, "3...2...1..."

_'Not Pregnant'_.

Freddie could feel a lump forming in his throat as he stared at the test in disbelief. He thought he'd be used to this by now, but it still hurt to see those words over and over again. Was it too early? Maybe it was too late in the day? Was he getting too old? It was frustrating and confusing, even more so when they so desperately wanted a kid. Everyone they knew were starting families, even their band mates, Roger and John. They seemed to be having kids left and right, especially John and his wife, who were expecting their sixth one soon.

It wasn't fair. All they wanted was to bring someone into the world that they could love unconditionally, someone they could be proud of. Someone that could have play dates with other children and bring home little arts and crafts projects. Freddie wanted to experience the journey of parenthood with his partner, the ups and downs and everything in between. But most of all, he and Brian wanted someone they could pass down their legacy to when they're gone. They didn't have to become a musician, but they wanted to at least inspire them to go out into the world and achieve their dreams, just like he and Brian had done.

Freddie heard the front door open, meaning Brian was home from college for the evening. He sniffled and wiped away his tears as he buried the failed test at the bottom of the trash.

"I'm home, Freddie my dear," Brian said with a smile on his face, "Where are you?"

Freddie breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth before he exited the bathroom to greet his partner. He forced a smile onto his face, "Hey, Bri."

Brian didn't buy his façade for a second and frowned at him. "Freddie, what's wrong?" He asked, resting a hand on his shoulder. He wiped a stray tear from Freddie's cheek with the other. "Why are you crying?"

Freddie just shook his head.

"Freddie..." Brian hooked a finger under Freddie's chin and tilted his head upward so their eyes met. "Did you take another test?"

Freddie nodded and buried his face in Brian's chest, crying harder.

"It's okay," Brian wrapped his arms around him, "We have to keep trying. It will happen one day."

"And when will that be?" Freddie mumbled. "When I'm--When we-we're on our deathbeds?"

Brian stroked Freddie's long raven hair. "No, Freddie. I know you're upset, and I am too. But it's not your fault. We can't give up. We just need to be a little more patient."

"I'm sick of being patient, Brian!" Freddie sobbed. "I just turned 28 last month. We aren't getting any younger..."

"I understand that," Brian began as he lead Freddie to the bedroom, "But we can't rush it. We want our baby to be as healthy as they can be, right?"

"Right..." Freddie sighed as he lied on the bed, staring at the ceiling.

Brian lied next to him. "I know you're putting yourself under a lot of stress. We're recording another album _and_ trying to have a baby. It's a lot to manage," he rolled over and pulled the other man close to him. "But we need to relax. We'll have our chance eventually."

"Let's just... Take a break from it for right now, I guess..." Freddie said sadly, "We need to be focusing on this next album anyway..."

Brian hummed in agreement and kissed his forehead. "No matter what happens though, we'll be okay. Child or no child, I'll still love you."

\--

**Month One: November**

Brian was already downstairs making breakfast, and Freddie was still asleep. He hadn't gotten much rest that night, which was a bit odd to Brian, since Freddie was usually a pretty heavy sleeper.

Aside from Freddie tossing and turning in bed, he'd gotten up at least five or six times to go to the bathroom. Brian was a little concerned, but he'd feel better once he heard Freddie snoring again.

But the most notable change Brian noticed was Freddie's mood. He seemed to get more irritated than usual with Roger during their recording sessions. Usually, Freddie would just brush off Roger's remarks about his technique, but recently he'd been snapping at him, telling him to 'just shut up' and 'I'd love to see you do it better, then.' Fortunately, the two of them never ended up in a physical altercation, but it did come close. That's when Brian would step in to stop them.

Brian figured it was all the stress and pressure slowly trickling out of him from the last couple of months, which he understood completely. He would ask Freddie if he was okay, and he'd say he was, but Brian suspected more was going on...

And speaking of Freddie, Brian saw him drag himself out of the bedroom and plop down in the chair at the small kitchen table.

"Good morning, Fred," Brian greeted as he turned off the stove and brought over two empty plates, placing one in front of Freddie and the other in front of the chair across from him. "You alright?"

Freddie sighed, and rubbed his eyes. "I guess, yeah..."

Brian then brought over a couple plates of the food he just made and set them down in the middle of the table. That was when he really took a look at Freddie: His hair was disheveled, his eyes were droopy and had dark circles beginning to form around them, and the black silk robe he wore every morning hung off his shoulders.

He looked a mess. The two of them were close enough where they could be honest with one another, but Brian knew that was not something he wanted to hear right now.

Brian took the seat across from him and began making his plate. "You're not okay, Freddie. I know there's something wrong. Are you getting ill?"

"Maybe..." he mumbled. "I felt fine a week ago..." He grabbed a single piece of toast and chewed on it. "But it's not the usual coughing and sneezing sort of ill, even though it's been freezing lately," Freddie explained. "It's different..."

"Do you think you might need a visit to the doc?" Brian asked as he sipped his tea. "We can cancel recording today if you need a day off too."

"Oh, there's no need for that. I'll be fine, dear." Freddie looked up and gave Brian a sleepy smile.

Brian just nodded. "Alright. We need to leave soon, but if you change your mind, I'll call the boys to let them know."

\--

After breakfast, Freddie went back into the bedroom to get dressed. He slipped out of his robe and put on a loose fitting shirt. But as he stepped into his jeans and pulled them up, he struggled to close the button.

"Are you bloody serious right now?" Freddie cursed in frustration as he kept fighting with it. He hadn't even noticed any weight gain. Had the stress on him really gotten that bad?

After a few more moments, Freddie had given up and just headed to the bathroom. All the struggling had put pressure on his bladder.

When he entered the bathroom and was about to sit down, Freddie paused. _'I should take another test...'_, he thought. He'd been avoiding the cupboard under the sink ever since he took the last test. He couldn't bear to look at another negative one. But... He thought about some of the symptoms he'd been experiencing for the last week or so. It wouldn't hurt to take another pregnancy test, would it? He and Brian had agreed to take a break from trying anyway, so he wouldn't be as upset even if it was negative.

Freddie kneeled down and opened the cupboard, fishing out a single test from the box of many and unwrapping it as he sat down on the toilet.

"Freddie? Are you alright?" Brian's voice asked in the hallway.

"Yes, I'm fine. I just had to pee." Freddie answered. Once he was done, he put the cap back on the stick and set it on the countertop as he flushed the toilet and washed his hands. He pulled out his phone and started counting. _'Three minutes...'_

"I'll make an appointment with our doctor, okay?" Brian said after a few moments of silence, leaning against the wall.

Freddie nodded, not taking his eyes off his phone. "Alright, dear."

He listened to Brian speak on the phone the entire time, "Good morning, Ms. Lancaster, my name is Brian May-Bulsara... Well, my partner Freddie is possibly getting ill and..."

Freddie had completely tuned out once time was up and took a deep breath. He picked up the test... "Oh my god..."

"Sorry, one moment--" Brian told the nurse on the phone "--Freddie, what's wrong?"

Freddie swung the bathroom door open with a wide grin plastered to his face. "We're going to be dads, Brian!"

"Wait... What-What?" Brian lowered the phone from his ear, not entirely sure if he heard him correctly.

Freddie giggled and held out the pregnancy test for Brian to see. "I'm pregnant!"

Brian took the small stick from him and stared at it for a moment before looking up and smiling. "You're... You're pregnant!"

Freddie nodded with excitement. "Yes, finally!"

Brian stepped forward and scooped Freddie up into his arms in a hug and twirled him around. "Oh, Freddie sweetheart, I'm so happy!"

"You and me both, darling!" Freddie laughed as he clung to him.

When Brian set him down, he realized the phone call was still going. "I apologize, Ms. Lancaster, I just found out some wonderful news... Oh, thank you. Next Thursday, you said?" He raised an eyebrow at Freddie as a way of asking him if he were free that day. Freddie nodded in response. "Yes, Thursday is fine. Okay, thank you. Have a good day!"

"We have to tell the boys!" Freddie said excitedly.

"Oh, definitely," Brian nodded, "But... Maybe not yet. Let's wait until the doc confirms it."

"Right, right," Freddie agreed.

Brian glanced at the time in the corner of his phone screen before putting it back into his pocket. "We should get going now." He grinned at Freddie and held out his hand.

Freddie held Brian's hand in his. "Actually, there is just _one_ thing wrong..." he grinned sheepishly, "I need to borrow your sweatpants. My jeans are a bit snug."

\--

The following Thursday, the couple went to the appointment, and their doctor confirmed that Freddie was, in fact, 100% pregnant. He was in tears just hearing the news. After trying off and on for a year, he and Brian had finally gotten what they'd been hoping, waiting, and wishing for. They almost couldn't believe it was true!

As they left the doctor's office and headed to the recording studio, Freddie's mind immediately started kicking into "Baby Mode": What will they name the baby? Who will they invite to the baby shower? What color will they paint the nursery? Will the baby look more like him or Brian? It was overwhelming to think about, but exciting at the same time.

Freddie was bubbling with a mixture of nervousness and excitement throughout the entire recording session. He sang his heart out, like he usually did, but he was acting much happier than he had been in the past month. And John and Roger definitely noticed.

"Alright, I think we're done for today. Good job, boys~" Freddie said after they'd finished recording their final song.

Everyone began putting their instruments away and got ready to head home. Roger stood up from his drum set and stretched. "Well, Fred, you seem to be back to your normal self," he smiled at him, "What's got you so happy all of a sudden?"

Freddie glanced over at Brian, who was sitting on the couch with his arms crossed, acting as if he didn't know what was going on. But he did flash him a grin.

"I don't know," Freddie shrugged, "I guess I've realized how bitchy I've been. And I apologize; I really am sorry." He looked between Roger and John with genuine guilt.

"It's okay," John spoke, "I think we've all been pretty frustrated. Don't worry about it."

"Yeah. We forgive you, Fred." Roger said.

As the two of them headed towards the exit, Freddie shook his head and stopped them. "No, wait. I mean it. I need to work on treating you guys better. I know I haven't been acting like it recently, but I'm grateful for us and our friendship," he took another look at Brian. "All five of us."

Roger furrowed his brows and actually counted everyone in the room in his head. "Um... Five...?"

"Mhm!" Freddie nodded and clasped his hands together, and beamed at them. "We're pregnant!"

"Oh, really? Wow, congratulations, you two!" Roger ran over to them and pulled them both into a hug. "I knew it would happen if you guys kept trying!"

Deaky even came over to join in. "Yeah, congrats. You two really deserve it."

Roger and John both knew how hard it'd been for them, which is why they didn't take it personally when Freddie (or even Brian) would get upset with them. They would support their band mates through thick and thin, whether it be through something as big and important as starting a family, or through something as simple as a cold. They basically _were_ a family in a sense, and none of them would want it any other way.

That night, Freddie and Brian lied in bed together and talked about everything they'd (try to) do to make sure this upcoming nine months was as manageable as possible, for the both of them.

"I can't believe we're having a baby," Brian said, kissing Freddie's cheek.

"Me neither," he smiled at him. But Brian noticed something underneath that smile...

"What are you thinking about?" Brian asked.

Freddie shook his head. "I... I just have a lot on my mind..."

"Like...?"

Freddie turned to lie on his side and face his husband. "This past week hasn't really felt real... Until today. It's _finally_ sunken in that we're about to have our first kid. And... I'm scared."

"I know exactly how you're feeling, sweetheart," Brian said softly. "I'll admit, I'm also a little scared. But this should be an exciting time, for the both of us."

Freddie hummed in agreement. "It's not so much about the pregnancy... It's more about the future. I've never taken care of a child before. What if..." he averted his eyes, "What if I'm not a good parent?"

"Freddie..." Brian reached up to gently cup Freddie's cheek in his hand. "We won't know until they're actually here. We're only human; we won't be 100% perfect parents all the time. You have to remember that. We won't have all the answers, and sometimes we won't always have the best advice. And that's okay. The most important thing is that our child will always have a loving family who will support them every step of the way."

Freddie smiled. "You're right."

"You're _amazing_, Freddie. You're supportive, you're kind, and you always know how to cheer people up. I personally think you'll be a wonderful parent." Brian used his hand to stroke Freddie's hair.

"Well, give yourself some credit too, darling. I know you'll get the hang of parenting fast, just like you do with everything else." Freddie snuggled closer to him, placing his head underneath his chin. "You'll be a great dad. I know it."

"We'll _both_ be great dads." Brian yawned and wrapped an arm around his partner. "I love you."

Freddie hummed sleepily. "I love you too."

\--

  
**Month Three: January**

Today officially marked the third month of Freddie's pregnancy. He was still excited to become a parent, and he knew being pregnant would have its challenges, but he _never_ suspected anything this intense. He was pretty much always tired, he got headaches frequently (which would cut rehearsals short in some cases), and just about any smell would make his stomach churn; he couldn't even _think_ about eating anything without getting the overwhelming urge to vomit. And despite his partner only observing his symptoms, Brian was almost certain they were having an effect on him as well.

Even though Freddie was three months along now, he wasn't starting to show quite yet, at least not through his clothing. But he definitely _felt_ like he was, especially when he'd slip into a pair of Brian's sweatpants, and when he'd look at himself in the mirror after a shower. If Freddie were honest with himself, he wasn't really looking forward to gaining weight. He didn't have a choice though, since his doctor told him he actually needed to gain weight and how much of it. But above all the superficial concerns, his main concern was the baby. He and Brian had gone so far as to say it was a miracle that they had conceived. So if it meant taking on an extra 30 pounds and feeling sleepy all the time, Freddie would deal with anything he had to in order to have a healthy child.

Freddie had fallen asleep on the couch in the living room while Brian made quick a trip to the grocery store. When he came back and took out the ingredients he needed for dinner, he frowned when he saw his husband and went over to wake him up.

"Freddie..." Brian said quietly with his hand on his shoulder, "Freddie, dear, wake up..."

Freddie whined and opened his eyes. "Wha-What's wrong?"

"Nothing, but you shouldn't sleep on the couch," Brian spoke in a normal voice now, "I'll help you to the room if you're still sleepy."

Freddie nodded and sat up as his husband helped him off the couch and up to his feet. They both walked down the hall to their bedroom, and Brian had an arm around Freddie's waist. "How are you feeling? Besides sleepy," he asked.

"Miserable..." Freddie mumbled. "I haven't eaten since this morning, and even then I could barely keep my food down..." He sat on the edge of the bed with a dull plop and sighed.

"Well I'll be making dinner soon so don't worry." Brian took a seat next to him, and Freddie rested his head on his shoulder.

"I haven't even felt like fucking," he giggled, "I apologize in advance if you get sexually frustrated."

Brian giggled at his little joke and pressed a kiss to his hair. "We don't always have to have sex to be intimate you know. Cuddling is just as good."

"You're right... Ooh!" Freddie lifted his head and looked at him as he got an idea, "What about naked cuddling?"

"Even better. We should do that tonight, actually." Brian winked at him before he stood back up to head to the kitchen. "Don't feel like you have to have sex if you don't want to... Okay?"

Freddie nodded and lied down. "Okay..." he yawned, "Can I go back to my nap now, dear?"

"Right, sorry. I'll call you when dinner is ready." Brian gave him a gentle smile before he left the room and carefully closed the door.

\--

**Month Five: March**

"Freddie, my dear..." Brian whispered as he gently shook Freddie by the shoulder.

"Hm...?" Freddie rubbed his eyes and yawned.

"Good morning~" Brian said sweetly with a chuckle. He leaned down and kissed his forehead. "Breakfast is ready. Did you sleep well?"

Freddie nodded and opened his eyes, grinning up at him. "That was the best sleep I've had since the little one started kicking. She wasn't kicking as much last night, though..."

"Mm..." Brian nodded and pushed away a tuft of hair from Freddie's face. "How is she right now?"

"Moving a little bit..." Freddie rested a hand on his belly. "I think you might actually be able to feel her this time."

Freddie shifted from lying on his side to lie at an angle on his back and lifted up his shirt. "Here..." He took one of Brian's hands in his and placed it on his tummy, resting his own on top.

"Feel anything?" Freddie asked.

Brian shook his head and frowned. "No..."

"Hm... She's shy I guess..." Freddie pulled his shirt back down when Brian took his hand away, and he sat up and hugged his husband.

"Don't be sad, Bri," Freddie said with his lips against Brian's neck, "You'll get to feel her kick one of these days. I promise."

Brian hugged him back. "I know. I guess I'll just have to be more patient."

"Mhm," Freddie kissed and nibbled at his neck. "Now let's eat, I'm starving!"

\--

At breakfast, Brian was glad to see that Freddie's appetite had come back. Now that he was practically eating for two, Brian made sure to cook healthy meals for Freddie. Not that they weren't already eating healthy, but he was a little more conscious of what he'd make. But he would occasionally let Freddie indulge in a slice or two of chocolate cake or a bit of ice cream.

After they'd finished eating and put away the dishes, Brian and Freddie had continued working on decorating the nursery. They'd converted the room next to theirs into one, and it turned out to be pretty spacious. They'd only started working on it about a week ago, now that Freddie was feeling better and had enough energy to start. They'd already painted the walls (they decided on a pastel green), and were now beginning to add the furniture.

Brian was busy putting together the crib, and Freddie was hanging a series of small picture frames up on the opposite wall above the short bookshelf they'd put in a few days ago.

"Bri, does the gold frame look crooked to you?" Freddie asked, stepping back from the wall and tilting his head to one side.

Brian looked over his shoulder. "Hm..." He finished tightening a screw and got up to stand behind Freddie and placed his hands on his hips. "It looks fine to me, actually."

Freddie nodded, then gasped when he felt the familiar fluttery feeling in his belly. He grinned and took Brian's hands from his hips and guided them to rest on his lower stomach.

And Brian finally felt it, he finally felt his little girl moving! He smiled and laughed. "There she is~"

Freddie giggled when Brian began rubbing his tummy. "Maybe you should talk to her," He sat down in the chair next to the bookshelf, "We should take a little break anyway."

Brian kneeled in front of him and lifted his shirt up halfway, and pressed his lips to the soft skin. "Hi, Morgan~ You don't know how excited we are to meet you."

Freddie chimed in. "Mhm. And even though you aren't here yet, Daddy and Papa already love you so much~"

Brian rested his head on Freddie's tummy, and the baby poked his cheek in response. "Papa is right. We'll talk to you every day, as much as we can."

According to their doctor, the baby was able to actually hear them now. And as a result, the couple would read her stories, and Freddie specifically would sing her lullabies, in addition to talking. And she would definitely respond to them in her own way with little pokes and kicks and tumbling around in Freddie's womb. Brian couldn't even begin to describe how happy he was now that he'd felt her move for the first time, even though Freddie had been feeling it for a couple weeks now.

"Aww, stop it, you're gonna make me cry..." Freddie used his thumb to wipe away a tear from Brian's face.

Brian didn't even realize he'd gotten a little emotional until Freddie said something. He grinned up at him, "Sorry, Fred." He pressed tender kisses all over his husband's belly.

Freddie giggled. "That tickles!"

"I know it does," Brian mumbled, "I love hearing you laugh~"

"Well, let's finish up what we need to do in here before we get too distracted, okay?" Freddie held Brian's hands and stood from the chair, bringing the man up with him. "Then you can give me all the tummy kisses you want."

"Promise?" Brian asked.

Freddie nodded and stood on his tiptoes to kiss him "Of course, darling. I promise."

\--

**Month Seven: May**

It was a beautiful day outside. The sun was behind a few clouds so it wasn't too hot, there was a gentle breeze, and Freddie and Brian were outside in their backyard enjoying the company of their closest friends and family. Today was their first ever baby shower, and just about everyone they invited had shown up. People had brought all kinds of things for them: flowers, balloons, greeting cards, and of course gifts for the baby. Roger and his wife had gifted them a very fancy stroller (one that doubled as a stroller _and_ a car seat), and John and his wife had gifted them some little toys. And with all the gifts they'd received, they wouldn't really have to actually buy much now (except for diapers and a few other essentials). Brian and Freddie were both incredibly grateful for all the love and support everyone had given them today, and that was all they could really ask for.

But as recently as a few weeks ago, Freddie had been acting... Off, to say the least. Brian just assumed his hormones were out of balance, but he'd been around Freddie long enough for these past seven months to know that was unlikely. For starters, Freddie had started wearing nothing but dark or black clothing, even if it was warm outside. This struck Brian as odd, since he usually wore brighter colors. But the one thing that really concerned him was Freddie's lack of desire for intimacy. Usually, they'd shower together, change in front of each other, and sometimes even sleep nude. Freddie would still hug and kiss Brian, but whenever it came to more risqué activities, Freddie would make excuses for why he didn't want to do any of them. And of course this upset Brian, but he wasn't the type to pressure someone into doing something they didn't want to do.

As the baby shower was winding down, and during a conversation the couple were having with a group of friends, Freddie excused himself to use the bathroom. Brian figured he'd come back after a couple of minutes, so he paid the excuse no mind as he thanked and said goodbye to the people that came to their little gathering. But as more and more people were leaving, there was still no sign of his husband.

Roger and John stayed behind to help Brian clean up and put everything away before they left as well.

"Tell Fred I said to take care!" John said from his rolled down car window.

"Will do! See you next week!" Brian waved and smiled at him, although he was extremely concerned.

As soon as everyone left, Brian rushed into the house and searched for Freddie. "Freddie, are you alright?" He called out as he knocked on the downstairs bathroom door. Then he opened it, but Freddie wasn't there.

"Freddie, sweetheart?" Brian made his way upstairs to the second bathroom, "I need to hear your voice to make sure you're okay..."

As soon as he was about to knock, he heard what sounded like sniffling coming from their closed bedroom door.

Brian sighed in relief a bit, because now he knew that Freddie was at least still here. But what was going on? He tried opening the door to the bedroom, but it was blocked.

"Freddie..." Brian said gently. "Open up, what's wrong?"

Freddie didn't answer, but he did stand up from blocking the door and he rushed over to the bed and lied on his side, still crying.

Brian successfully opened the door this time, and closed it behind him. He said nothing as he lied down and wrapped his arms around him from behind.

"I-I'm sorry, Brian..." Freddie finally spoke, "I didn't mean to leave you out there..."

"Don't worry about it." Brian reassured, "I just want to know what's got you like this. You've been acting different lately."

Freddie sniffled. "You'll think I'm silly for crying about it..."

"No I won't. Your feelings are important."

"I... I just..." Freddie hesitated, "I felt like everyone was looking at me today..."

Brian propped himself up on one elbow. "Well, we were the hosts, weren't we? Of course they'd be looking at you."

"That's not what I mean..." Freddie sighed and rubbed his eyes, "I've gotten so fucking _fat_, Brian... And everyone was staring at me..."

Brian frowned and leaned down to kiss his cheek. "Oh, Freddie..." He started to gently rub his side, "I'm sure no one was staring at you for that reason... In fact, I'm sure they weren't even staring at all."

"Oh, please, have you seen me?" Freddie finally rolled over onto his back to look at Brian, "I've blown up like a balloon!" He covered his face with his hands. "I'm disgusting..."

Freddie's behavior finally made sense now. Brian helped him sit up, "Freddie, don't talk about yourself that way. I won't allow it."

"But it's true..." Freddie mumbled as he buried his face into Brian's shoulder.

"No it isn't. Look at me," Brian pulled away and tilted Freddie's head upward using a finger underneath his chin to look him in the eye. "Freddie, I love you. I married you for you. I didn't marry you because of your looks, although that's definitely a plus. But it doesn't matter to me what size you are, or what you look like. Because you're still an amazing, caring, passionate human being. And this..." Brian looked down and touched Freddie's stomach, "This life inside you... She wouldn't even be there if it wasn't for you. You've already been doing so much to prepare for her arrival. Aren't you proud of yourself?"

Freddie nodded and smiled a little. "I am. I'm very proud. But you also played a part, dear."

Brian chuckled. "Only for a few minutes."

That got Freddie to laugh and really smile. "Oh, stop it, you naughty boy!"

Brian tucked a strand of Freddie's hair behind his ear and grinned. "I can be even more naughty if you want..." He kissed Freddie's cheek and along his jaw.

Freddie sighed and lied back against the pillows, and wrapped his arms around Brian's shoulders. "Yeah... I really need this right now~"

"I'll make you feel so good tonight, Freddie. I promise. You deserve so much."

Brian kissed his husband tenderly, and for the first time in months, they shared one of the most intimate and beautiful moments that they'd both remember for a long time.

\--

**Month Nine: July**

Freddie and Brian sat in a private corner of a very upscale restaurant on this particular night. Brian had turned 28 today, and he insisted that he and Freddie just have a quiet night in tonight. They had a small gathering at their place earlier in the day, and Brian opened up his gifts and just conversed with the people that came to celebrate. He figured that Freddie wouldn't want to go anywhere, since the baby was due any day now. But Freddie didn't let that get in the way of his plan to take him out on a dinner date.

Freddie sipped his glass of water and continued to eat his plate of vegetable pasta. "You know," he began after he swallowed his food, "I didn't think I'd like vegan food. But it's actually quite nice."

"See? I told you it was good," Brian grinned at him. "You just have to find things you think you might like."

"I may have played it safe," Freddie said with a sheepish smile, "But I'll branch out next time."

Brian was honestly so proud and grateful that Freddie was willing to try new things. It only made him admire his husband that much more. "How are you feeling?"

"I feel fine. Pretty good, actually," Freddie answered. "I thought I'd be exhausted by now, but I feel okay."

"Contractions bothering you?"

Freddie shook his head. "Not right now, no."

Brian nodded and smiled. "Good."

The two of them finished and paid for their meal and Brian helped Freddie to the car. "Thank you so much, honey," he said and gave Freddie a kiss on the cheek and opened the passenger door. "But you really didn't have to."

"I know," Freddie sat in the seat and buckled in, "I knew you've been wanting to try this place out for a while now. It was the least I could do."

"Well today was great." Brian closed the passenger door and went around to the driver's side and got in, started up the car, and began driving home. "The only thing that would make it better is if the little one arrived."

Freddie chuckled. "You're telling me! I'm willing to wait, but at the same time I just want her to get here already!"

Freddie had been 'nesting' for the last week or so. He'd frequently go into the nursery and make little adjustments that no regular person would notice, such as arranging the books on the bookshelf or turning on the mobile above the crib to make sure it worked. He'd even packed a large bag with everything he would need for his stay at the hospital when the time came. Brian honestly found it adorable, and he knew Freddie would be an amazing father.

\--

That night, long after the couple had showered and gone to bed, Freddie tossed and turned in his sleep. The contractions were absolutely _unbearable_, and he woke up in a panic with his heart hammering in his chest.

"Brian, I think it's time!" Freddie said urgently as he woke up his husband.

Brian woke up almost instantly and sat up. "Hm, what's happening, are you okay?"

"I'm going into labor!" Freddie repeated.

It took Brian a moment for his sleep-addled brain to realize what was going on before his eyes widened in shock. "Oh my god," he hopped out of bed and got dressed haphazardly. "I'll call the hospital right now! Just stay right there, okay?"

Freddie nodded and leaned against the headboard, groaning in pain and rubbing his belly to try and calm himself down.

"...Alright, thank you so much," Brian hung up the phone and picked up the hospital bag and threw it on his shoulder. "They're setting up a room for you right now and it'll be ready by the time we get there."

He helped Freddie out of bed and downstairs to the car. He'd never seen Freddie in so much pain before, and he'd be lying if he said it didn't break his heart to see him this way. He felt an extreme range of emotions right now: Worry, panic, nervousness, and even a little excitement. And as he drove (a little over the speed limit) to the hospital, he said a silent prayer to any deity that his husband would be okay.

Soon enough, they made it to the hospital, and Brian followed Freddie and the nurses to the birthing room.

Once they arrived in the room, the nurses helped Freddie change into a hospital gown, and Freddie carefully lied down on the bed.

"Is there anything you need, Mr. Bulsara?" One tall, tan-skinned nurse asked.

"Maybe some extra pillows, thank you." Freddie said as he settled in.

The nurse nodded. "Okay. Well, please, you two make yourselves comfortable. If you need anything, just press this red button on the phone, alright?"

"Yes, thank you," Brian nodded with a smile and sat in the chair next to the bed.

"I'll go get you some extra pillows," the nurse smiled back, and the two left the room.

Brian let out a sigh and set the hospital bag they packed on the floor and started unpacking. "How are you feeling?"

Freddie turned his head towards him and smiled weakly, "A little better. The contractions stopped for now."

"Well you're doing a great job, baby," Brian reached out and held Freddie's hand. "Just think: Our little girl will be here before we know it~" he kissed his knuckles.

Freddie grinned and closed his eyes. "I know."

"I'm gonna set everything up, okay?" Brian said as he let go of his hand.

Freddie nodded.

Brian took a moment to look around the room: It really looked like they were in a hotel rather than a hospital. The bed was a queen-sized bed, the large window on one side of the room had soft floral-patterned curtains (which were drawn at the moment), there was a bathroom on the opposite side with a toilet and shower/bathtub combo, and in front of the bed was a television with a console. The floor was carpeted, and the lights weren't the typical harsh fluorescent lights you'd find in a regular hospital room, they were warm and their intensity could be adjusted. Freddie had insisted that he wanted to give birth in a hospital (because he _'Didn't want to soil the bed sheets at home!'_), but he also wanted to feel as if he _was_ at home. He and Brian didn't even know birthing rooms were a thing, but when they discovered them, Freddie was dead-set on booking one for this very moment.

The nurse came back with more pillows, and Brian unpacked almost everything they had in the bag: Bottles of water, various small snacks, toiletries, extra clothing for Freddie and himself, and of course clothing for the baby. The hospital would provide them with diapers and formula, so they didn't have to worry about packing those things.

"Bri..." Freddie mumbled when the nurse left.

"Hm? Need anything?" Brian sat on the edge of the bed.

"Could you lay down with me?"

Brian smiled and took off his shoes. "Of course, sweetheart~" he lied down and spooned his husband with an arm draped across his chest. Freddie reached up and held his hand.

"Thank you." Freddie smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too."

\--

When morning came, Brian hadn't even realized it was until he decided to glance at his phone: It was a little after 7am. Freddie and Brian slept on and off throughout the night, with Brian occasionally getting up to get things for Freddie, helping him to the bathroom, feeding him snacks and water, and helping him change positions. He'd never taken care of Freddie as much as he had in the past few hours. He was definitely tired, but he knew Freddie was absolutely exhausted, so he wouldn't complain.

Brian got up and went into the small bathroom and brushed his teeth. Freddie had gone back to sleep, but he woke up when he felt Brian leave the bed.

"Morning, Bri~" Freddie grinned sleepily at him, lying on his side.

"Morning," Brian finished brushing and rinsed off his toothbrush, "I was hoping I didn't wake you up."

Freddie shrugged. "I've been awake for a little while. Bloody contractions again..."

"Oh..." Brian came back to the bed and sat down, "If you want, we can take a walk in the hallway or go outside for a bit. Or I can start a bath for you."

"A bath sounds nice," Freddie said with a nod.

There was a soft knock at the door. "Come in," Brian said.

A nurse opened the door and smiled at the couple. "Good morning. How are you feeling, Mr. Bulsara?"

"I'm fine. Brian was about to start a bath for me." Freddie sat up and stretched.

The nurse turned her attention to Brian, "I can take care of him if you want to step out."

Brian looked at Freddie, who smiled and nodded.

"Sure, I'll just be outside then. Thank you." Brian put on his shoes and left the room to head out into the courtyard.

As soon as he stepped outside, Brian took a deep breath of fresh air, and walked along the sidewalk. The cool summer morning air flowing through his hair helped him calm down just a bit. He took his phone out of his pocket and he saw a missed call from Roger, and a text from him sent about ten minutes ago. He had forgotten he had his phone on silent.

_**Roger:** Hey, Bri everything alright? How is Freddie doing?_

_**Brian:** He's doing fine. I'll call you._

Brian dialed his number and waited for him to pick up.

_"Hey, Bri, what's up? How are you guys doing?"_ Roger answered.

"We're doing good. Freddie went into labor last night at around 2, so we've been in the hospital since then. I just stepped outside for a moment."

_"Oh, well I wish you guys luck!"_ Roger said with an audible smile in his voice, _"Before you know it, you two will be at home with your kid."_

"Yeah..." Brian's voice trailed off.

_"What's the matter?"_

"I'm just... I'm worried, Rog. I know he'll be okay, but a part of me can't help but feel uneasy... You know?"

_"Yeah. I felt the same way with my first kid. I was terrified, actually. But just... Be there for Freddie. Be by his side when the time comes and support him. Make him feel loved. He'll need it now more than ever."_

Brian smiled. "You're right. Didn't think you had such good advice, honestly."

Roger chuckled. _"I have my moments, I guess."_

"Thanks, Rog. Really."

_"Of course, Bri. Anytime."_

"I should go back up to the room now. He's probably looking for me."

_"Alright. Say hi to Fred for me."_

"Will do. Talk to you later."

Brian hung up and took another deep breath as he headed back into the hospital. '_Freddie will be okay, Brian. He's strong. And he has you by his side. Roger is right. You just need to encourage and support him.'_

When he reached the second floor, the nurse that stayed with Freddie swung the door open and frantically looked around.

"What's wrong?" Brian asked her.

"Oh, there you are, Mr. Bulsara! It's time!" She said with a smile on her face. "He's looking for you."

Brian nodded, his heart pounding in his chest as he rushed into the birthing room.

There were three other nurses in the room with him: Two standing on either side of the bed, and one at the end of the bed, prepared for the delivery. Freddie was breathing heavily, gripping onto the sheets and legs spread wide as he grunted while the nurses encourage him to push.

Brian hurried to his side. "Freddie, I'm here," he ran one hand through his hair to comfort him, "I'm here, baby, I'm here. You can do this."

Freddie's eyes were closed, just focusing on pushing, but he did let go of the sheets to grip Brian's hand tightly.

"Come on, push, she's coming out!" The nurse said, "You can do it, Mr. Bulsara!"

Tears were forming at the corners of Freddie's eyes. He'd never been in so much pain in his life, and he was already exhausted. "I... I can't do anymore..."

"Freddie, yes you can. I believe in you." Brian squeezed his hand and kissed it.

Freddie pushed again with a scream, the tears running down his face now.

"Her head is out!" The nurse exclaimed with excitement, "Alright, take a break for a second, I'm just going to clear her nose and mouth."

"You're doing great, honey," Brian said, wiping the sweat from Freddie's forehead with a rag. He could see the top of their daughter's head from the angle he was at. "You're almost there, keep going."

"Okay, give me another push, you can do it!" The nurse encouraged.

Freddie wasn't sure if he could... But then he heard the first cry of his child, and a surge of energy rushed through him, and he pushed hard.

And there she was: On July 20th, at 7:58am, Morgan Bulsara was born.

"She's beautiful, Mr. Bulsara," The nurse said. One of the other nurses grabbed the scissors and clamp to cut the umbilical cord.

Freddie's legs went limp, and he finally opened his eyes and saw his newborn child being placed on his bare chest. He immediately held her in his arms and smiled down at her. And in that moment, it seemed as if everything and everyone around him had faded away. He was amazed by her pink tiny little hands and her scrunched up face, and the short little curls of hair on top of her head. And when he held out his pointer finger, and she grabbed onto it, Freddie could barely contain his happiness.

"Welcome home, dear Morgan," he said hoarsely, more tears of joy rolling down his cheeks, "I love you so much."

Brian grinned from ear to ear at their interaction, and he also began getting emotional. He sat down in the chair next to the bed and stroked Freddie's hair.

"Congratulations, you two. We'll leave you alone to spend some time with her," the nurse said with a smile, "I'll be back in a few minutes to do some tests on her, okay?"

Freddie nodded, not taking his eyes off the baby.

The nurses left, and Brian let out a sigh of relief. "I'm so proud of you, Freddie. Look at what we've created."

"She's gorgeous," Freddie said, "Did you take any photos of her yet? I want Deaky and Roger to see."

"Oh, right," Brian pulled out his phone to snap a few pictures. "Do you still want them to visit?"

"Of course I do. They're family to us." Freddie answered, looking up at him. "In fact, you should call them and ask."

Brian aimed the camera at the little human, and as soon as he did, she opened her eyes, almost as if she knew her photo was being taken! He giggled and took a few pictures. "She's definitely your daughter, Freddie. She's practically posing for us."

"Hm?" Freddie looked back down at her and gasped. "Oh my goodness. She's definitely got your eyes, dear. I was actually hoping she would."

Brian called both Roger and John and told him the news. John said he would be on his way soon, and Roger was already on his way, since he had just dropped off his younger kids at school.

As they waited, the nurse came back with a pen and clipboard, a thermometer, and a stethoscope around her neck. She ran a few basic tests on Morgan, such as listening to her heart and taking her temperature.

"Good news, little Morgan is nice and healthy." the nurse said with a smile. She diapered the baby and placed a little cap on her head to keep her warm, and she handed her back to Freddie. "You'll actually be able to leave today if you feel well enough. Okay?"

"Okay. Thank you." Freddie nodded and brought his attention to Brian once she left again. "Want to try holding her?" he chuckled, "I've been a little selfish I suppose."

Brian smiled and reached out, and Freddie carefully handed the baby to him. He cradled her in his arms and giggled. "Hello, little Morgan. Daddy is very happy to see you."

Morgan stared up at her father and studied his face. Well, not so much studying, more like wondering who this person was that was holding her. But he seemed pretty nice! Maybe he had some milk for her to drink? She opened her mouth and turned her head towards Brian's chest.

"Oh..." Brian looked up at Freddie, "I think she wants milk."

"Perfect, I wanted to try feeding her anyway," Freddie unbuttoned his hospital gown even more than it already was so that his chest was completely exposed now. Brian handed Morgan back to Freddie, who then brought her to his chest. She had some trouble latching on at first, but with Freddie's help, she began to nurse, and he was extremely relieved. He was worried he wouldn't be able to produce any milk after being on T for a few years now, and he wasn't sure how long he'd be able to chestfeed. But he'd try as much as possible before feeding her formula.

A little while later, Roger and John came to visit. Freddie and Brian couldn't have been happier or more excited to show off their newborn child. They were already talking about setting up play dates with John's newest kid once Morgan was a little older. And speaking of Morgan, she had fallen asleep after Freddie had fed her. And Freddie took that as a cue to probably get some rest himself.

After John and Roger left, Freddie carefully placed Morgan into the little hospital crib beside the bed. He stretched and yawned, settling into the sheets and grinning at Brian.

"Thank you, Bri," Freddie said.

"For what, hun?" Brian asked.

"For staying with me” --he yawned again-- "and supporting me. Through all of this."

Brian yawned as well. "Well of course, Fred," he smiled and reached over to stroke Freddie's hair, "I wouldn't have missed this for the world."

Freddie rolled over on his side and looked up at him, "I think we all need to sleep for a bit. Why don't you call the nurse back in to change the sheets so you can lay down with me?"

Brian nodded. "Sure."

\--

It was now around 4pm, and it was time for Freddie and Brian to go home with their little one. Brian dressed Morgan up in what they called her "welcome home outfit", which was a simple pink and white polkadot coverall, a white hat, and white shoes. The nurses gave them diapers and samples of formula Freddie had chosen earlier when he fed Morgan again.

Once they had everything packed up, they made their way down to the first floor and thanked the nurses and the woman at the front desk. And in return, the staff congratulated them once again and wished them good luck with the new baby.

Freddie took a deep breath of fresh air when they stepped outside and smiled as he and Brian walked to the car. "Can you believe it, Bri? We're dads now!"

"I'll admit, it was hard to imagine considering we tried for so long," he said as he strapped Morgan into her car seat in the back, "but I couldn't be happier now that it's finally a reality."

Freddie sat in the back with Morgan and entertained her while Brian drove home. He made a bunch of silly noises and faces at her, even though he knew she wouldn't really understand why. But she did acknowledge him a few times. Brian glanced at Freddie in the rear view mirror every now and then, and just seeing how happy he was made his heart melt. He had no doubt in his mind that Freddie would be a great father.

It wasn't long before they made it back home, and it seemed that as soon as they did, the sleepiness and exhaustion had come back in full force. Brian took care of getting everything out of the car while Freddie headed upstairs to the nursery to lie Morgan down in her crib. She was content at first, but when Freddie headed out of the room, she started to whine. And when he was completely out of sight, she began to cry.

Freddie poked his head in the doorway and frowned. "What's wrong, sweetie?"

Her crying hadn't stopped.

Freddie came back into the room. "What's the matter?" He picked Morgan back up, and her cries got a little quieter as Freddie bounced her gently. "You want Papa to stay with you?"

Morgan rested her head on his shoulder and clung to his shirt collar. He sat in the chair next to the small bookshelf and held her until she had calmed down again. "Papa's here, don't worry."

Brian came into the nursery then to see what was going on. "Is she alright?" He asked in a hushed tone.

Freddie nodded. "She didn't want me to leave, is all."

Morgan tried turning her head towards the sound of Brian's voice. Was that Daddy? Although Papa was holding her right now, she wanted to be held by Daddy too! But how would she tell him that if she couldn't speak yet?

Morgan squirmed in Freddie's arms, and he took that as her wanting to be alone now. "Hm. You want to lie down now?"

"Actually, Fred, let me hold her." Brian reached out his arms, and Freddie handed the baby to him. Brian held her close, and she stopped her squirming. "I think she just wanted both of us to hold her."

"I think you're right." Freddie stood up and rubbed his eyes.

"Go sleep, Fred. You need it more than I do." Brian said.

"Oh, I can't leave you two here, that would be selfish." Freddie put his hands on his hips.

"No, really, I've got this." Brian gave a reassuring smile. "Just go rest. I'll take care of Morgan."

Freddie was a little apprehensive. It wasn't that he didn't trust his husband, he just felt bad leaving them alone. But Brian kept insisting, so he went next door to their room and lied down for a much needed rest.

\--

Brian had to admit, it _was_ a little scary being alone with a brand new baby. When she cried, he wasn't always sure of what she needed: A diaper change, food, a nap, just wanting to be held? Sometimes it was a combination of those things, or she would cry for really no reason at all it seemed. He was so afraid of messing up, but he had to overcome that fear whether he wanted to or not. He knew there would be times where Freddie wouldn't be around, so it was best to practice now rather than later.

But once Morgan had tired herself out four hours later, Brian finally put her in her crib to (hopefully) sleep for at least a majority of the night. He tiptoed out of the room and closed the door halfway, and he headed downstairs to begin working on a little something he'd planned out.

Freddie didn't realize how long he'd been asleep. It was a little after 9pm when he woke up, and his first thought was to check on the baby. He peeked into the nursery, and saw that Morgan was fast asleep, her chest rising and falling. He smiled and started down the hall to the bathroom to take a shower, but he saw the light coming from downstairs and was curious as to what Brian was up to.

As he made his way down the stairs, he smelled a heavenly scent coming from the kitchen, almost like pizza. That's when he saw Brian come around the corner with two plates in his hands. "Oh, good, you're up just in time," he set the plates down on the table in the dining room, "I made us dinner. Well, the freezer section at Tesco made us dinner."

Freddie chuckled. "What's this for?"

Brian pulled out his chair for him, and Freddie sat down. "I thought I'd do a little something nice for us after the stressful day we've had. We can take a little time to relax."

On the plate in front of Freddie were two pieces of margherita pizza, a bowl of fresh tossed salad, and a wine glass full of a reddish-purple liquid.

"Don't worry, it's grape juice. I know you probably won't be drinking for a long while." Brian sat across from him.

Freddie giggled. "Oh Bri, you're just too cute, you know that?" He picked up a slice of pizza and took a bite. "I really appreciate it."

"It was the least I could do," Brian took a bite of his salad.

"I'm just surprised you still had the energy to cook anything. You didn't have any problems with Morgan?"

"No. I told you not to worry," Brian smiled at him, "Although she does like pulling my hair."

Freddie grinned in amusement. "Well, thank you for letting me rest. God knows we'll be running rampant for the next couple of months. But it'll be worth it."

"Definitely," Brian picked up his glass and raised it up, "I propose a toast. To us, and our new lives as parents.

Freddie raised his glass, and clinked it with Brian's. "To us, my dear. Forever and always."

**Author's Note:**

> My god, what a novel I've written lol. I did have a lot of fun writing it though!! I probably won't write another mpreg fic tho. I think I'l stick to smut lol.
> 
> Thank you for reading!!


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